Insights from Deborah Hill

Breaking through the ceiling

April 20, 2009 · Leave a Comment

She tried desperately to rise above the confines of her proverbial ceiling – to break through to the next level. She banged against it, cajoled it, tried to set it on fire. She then pretended it didn’t exist, only to find she kept hitting her head on it. Finally, in despair and resignation she sank to the ground. Despair was suffocating. She gasped, short of breath, and rising quickly ran to the door to get some fresh air. One step outside the door she was awestruck by the wide open, unlimited, expansively beautiful sky. Freedom was one step away. The room was an illusion; the possibilities infinite. What is your room? Is there a ceiling? Where’s the door? What’s binding you? Unnecessary obligations? Self-inflicted emotional wounds? Negative thinking? What chains do you support through limiting beliefs? How badly do you want to fly free? There is no past. It’s time to open new doors and new wings. The journey is never-ending – the possibilities infinite. If you’d like to open new doors and fly, download a free copy of my limiting beliefs worksheet at www.TheAwarenessInitiative.com

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To Hold Together or Fly

April 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

“How can I hold it together?”, he asked. The answer came on a whisper: “You can’t.” There’s nothing to hold together. Everything is expanding. It’s a time of transformation. Everything moves. You move. You smile, you breathe, you do what comes next with faith. You’ll float through stronger and wiser. Smile and you’ll find joy. Laugh and you’ll fly.

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Diversity Adds Understanding and Awareness

April 6, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Cultural differences mean different ways of doing business. How can we create global business relationships that work seamlessly? By learning to relate on a deeper level – a communication at the level where our essential natures meet. This is where each of us understands our own and the other’s definitions of ethical business practices and can agree to them.

We need to revert to the kind of agreement that was once sealed with an honest handshake, or with the mixing of blood in some cultures. It would be a binding agreement based upon understanding and honor. This deepened understanding of each other would also help us to make better teammates.

I find it fascinating that doing business globally is forcing us to evaluate our own ethics and business practices and better understand those of other cultures. We can then work together without judgment and full knowledge of what each of us believes – learning new ways of doing business, as well. This could help us to move to a place of global understanding and refinement in business and in life.

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Meditation

March 27, 2009 · 2 Comments

April 4, 2008

I teach mediation and people say to me, “I can’t meditate. I sit and all I do is get carried away with my thoughts.” Of course you do. Do you expect to sit down for the first time and “get it?” It’s like saying, “I haven’t brushed my teeth in 50 years, and I brushed for five minutes and my breath still stinks.” You sit and meditate because all you do is get carried away with your thoughts.

Meditation can be very elaborate, involving ritual activities and tools. Or, it can be very simple. To begin just focus on one thing: your breath, a chant, a flower, a flame, an sunset. Focus only on the object or your breath and try not to get caught up in your thoughts. At first you’ll probably focus for a second and then end up thinking about something else. So, stop and focus again. You think about your mother. Stop and focus again. You think about work. But, as you continue to practice you will begin to notice when you’re carried away and have some control over it. Soon you’re able to focus for 2 seconds, 5 minutes, 10 minutes, more. And, it keeps getting better.

Huge change may not happen overnight, but you will notice a change in yourself and your life when you meditate. It’s best to meditate everyday. Like doing exercise, when your body gets weak if you let up, your mind control will get weak and the mind will get cluttered if  you don’t meditate regularly. But soon you’ll notice that your life is moving more smoothly. You’re handling stress better. You’ll probably even feel better. You’ll accomplish more . . . Isn’t that worth 10 minutes a day?

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The Power of An Objective Glance

March 27, 2009 · 4 Comments

I love coaching others to help them to transition to a better life. I give insightful information and techniques to promote change during a session. but I don’t try to fix someone. And, I only give information if it’s requested. It wasn’t always this way.

I used to believe that constructive criticism of others was helpful. It isn’t. Criticism, no matter how well intended or padded hits like a dagger and causes damage, not productive change. Still, even having learned this information I found myself habitually shooting verbal darts at people. I was shocked at the damage I was doing and committed to change. It’s a process that I’m continually refining. Here are some techniques I’m using:

1. Practice objective observation of others. Avoid having opinions. Remember, I don’t really know why others do what they do. And, it’s none of my business.
2. Be on vigilant watch for judgmental thoughts concerning myself and other people, and drop them.
3. When I feel the need to say something “insightful” and unsolicited, pause and focus on my breath. Look within to see what I need to learn from the situation. Do I exhibit the same behavior that I want to comment on? Accept myself, have respect for the other person and pull back.
4. Create strong energetic boundaries around me and focus on staying within them.
5. Know that the other person has a specific lesson to learn and journey to take. Don’t interfere. Embody respect.

While practicing all of the above I still notice the behavior of the other person. When I am accomplishing the above, I am an objective, non-judgmental observer. I’m making something obvious to both of us, and being OK with the behavior. The other person is made aware of the behavior without feeling judged. He or she can then decide what to do with it. In this atmosphere of objectivity the other person is able to change if he or she chooses. There is no need to argue or resist the observation. There is nothing to resist when there is no criticism of it. The path is clear for growth and change, or for self-acceptance if change is not desired.

Relations are intact, boundaries are maintained, and mutual respect creates a bond. Both people learn and move on.

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An Everyday Miracle

March 23, 2009 · Leave a Comment

“Ask and you shall receive.” I did and I did. It’s Monday and I’m in Utah skiing with my daughter and son-in-law for 4 days. Unfortunately they both have to work on Tuesday, and I don’t feel like skiing alone right now. I really want to ski with someone tomorrow. So, last night I asked for someone to show up who I’d enjoy being/skiing with. I also emailed a friend in Atlanta with some information about my brother’s website: www.inyourkitchen.com. I mentioned that I was in Utah. She just called me from the slopes at the Canyons (in Utah). She and her husband are here with friends and we’re getting together tomorrow. Miracles happen daily if we just ask. So happy!!!!

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Is It A Sign

March 2, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Has this happened to you? You have a question on your mind, or perhaps you’ve even asked it out loud. You need an answer and haven’t been able to see your way. Suddenly you see a billboard that somehow speaks to you, or a stranger makes an unsolicited comment that seems to hold profound meaning.

Or, maybe you haven’t asked, but you’re continually seeing “1111” on clocks, mailboxes or other digital devices. Is this something that you should take note of?
However it is that you see something, or hear something that makes you take notice, should you believe it? Is it a sign or merely a projection of your mind? Is this information your real truth? How can you tell?
1. Trust that information can come to you this way. We do get communication and insights – signs –  from our essential selves or guidance from a higher source. Often the mind wants to discount the information as a coincidence or as unfounded.
2. Notice how you feel when you see or hear it. Does a “hush” come over you? Do you feel a profound momentary stillness? Does it feel important, or are you just thinking it? If time seems to stop for a split second it’s a sign. Take note.
3. Are you getting the same message or signal over and over? If you are it is real. Pay attention to it.

Real information is being fed to us. If we pay attention and follow the signs we move in the right direction and are given insight to make the correct choices. The more we pay attention, the more information we get. Don’t be fooled by your mind playing tricks on you. Do honor real information and follow the signs, and you’ll be guided along the path of success.

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Hope For The New World

December 18, 2008 · Leave a Comment

One night during a difficult period of my cancer treatment I awoke from a seeming sleep and felt an extreme depth of aloneness and feel – the one that the elderly who are alone feel. Perhaps they have no medical care – or it’s not working; no suppport, or family or distant family. It felt like living in a black hole of pain and fear. I knew this was not my fear. I was seeing and feeling the pain and fear of others, and I was horrified and felt deep compassion for them. There are so many of these people living now. And there are going to be so many more.

The upcoming years are so important. Who will take care of them/us? Perhaps, our new administration will help us to solve the issues involved. But we all need to be actively looking at this important issue and finding ways to help our elders and to change our medical system so that it works for everyone.

My father has built senior citizen high rise buildings that offer medical care, transportation and activities for people living there. Each unit has its own kitchen and is very comfortable. Or, they can go down and dine with others. Some don’t want to move out of their homes. There is a great need for in-home care, visitation and transportation. Organizations are being formed that help these people. Or, perhaps we can build some. I’m open to suggestions.

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The New Tipping Point

December 14, 2008 · 2 Comments

I recently visited an amazing exhibit at the High Museum of Art in Atlanta. It was a display entitled The First Emperor: China’s Terracotta Army, and showed the amazing statues that surrounded the remains of the first amazing emperor of China. The exhibit also tells about his life and accomplishments, which were amazing. One thing that struck me was his philosophy: “Men are inherently evil and need to be controlled.” This contrasted with the earlier philosophy of Confucious: “People are inherently good and need to be believed in.” Both of these philosophies are correct. We are all evil and we are all inherently good. Each day we have situations that give us opportunities to tip in the evil or good direction – to follow what we know is right or not; to be ethical or not. Our entire world is facing this tipping point. A restructuring of values and goals is shaping us and leading us to embrace the good in us. Those that don’t are facing seriousl difficulties in their lives – or will shortly.

I know several people, who like myself, try to overlook the evil in the world and focus on the good. Unfortunately, this blindsided approach often leads to problems when we get sideswiped by some evil scheme or malintentioned person. I now see life and people for what they are and avoid the evil. It’s there, but I don’t have to be around it, or buy into it. It’s a good example, in fact, for me to look within and do even more evil cleansing. Each glimpse at evil is an affirmation to me to honor the good within and tip correctly in each moment. To act with integrity, and do the right thing. I also watch my thoughts and eliminate ineffective negative beliefs and criticisms of myself and others.

I may not change the world, but each tip changes the world around and within me.

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Surviving The Times And Creating The Future

November 12, 2008 · Leave a Comment

Lately I’ve been asked to discuss what I see happening with our economy and our world right now, and how to deal with these changes. Here is how I see it:

We are now, and have for several years, been undergoing a global, shift in values and awareness. It is a time of great transition to a new way of working, relating and being. Throughout recent history humanity has been creating a world based upon certain values and accepted standards. The values and standards of our past worked then, do not serve us now. We’ve worn out the old model and have come to the end of a cycle.

We are in the process of transitioning to a new way of relating, acting, working, being. This new model will be more conscientious, respectful, aware, connected, ecological and loving. We will work and play more harmoniously with each other and with our planet, doing more of what we love to do without obligation or pressure. We will create more quickly and easily using our thoughts and intentions. We will release and rework much of the negativity that has defined us and crippled us.

I see this happening, and I hope that you can see it happening this way, as well. We create our future by visualizing it. If we worry and dread, we create situations that are worrisome and dreadful. It’s important to instead visualize a bright future that is harmonious and peaceful. We can then create that. This is a great time to re-look at our lives and world and imagine how we’d like it to be. One way to assist in this process is to down things we want to happen in our lives and in your world. Use positive language and non-judgmental thinking. For example, “We are able to resolve our cultural differences through effective communication.” This is a better creative sentence than, “We will stop killing each other.”

So how do we think positive when we’re faced with a tumbling economy and war? First, and foremost it’s essential that we stay present in each moment and reflect only on what’s occurring right now. For example, “Right now, I have enough to eat. I’m warm and comfortable. I’m alive and the sun is shining. I can deal with what’s happening in my life today, and live with that.”

I’ve come to realize the value of being present in the moment while undergoing breast cancer treatment. There were times when it was painful and my body was undergoing debilitating changes. I was unable to work, and went without income for a couple months. If I had projected that pain and poverty extending into the future I would have been miserable. Instead, I stayed present with it and projected healing and rebirth. I decided to learn from the experience that I was having and use that information and new wisdom when I was well. I also found ways to be positive. I did what made me feel best in the moment, whether it was sleep, talking to friends, reading, walking, meditating, or even just sitting still. Instead of projecting that pain and suffering into a loss in the future, I decided that this was a learning time. I used it as a time of healing and rebirth. I’ve gained a tremendous amount from this experience. I don’t recommend cancer, if you can find another way to do it. But, I’m at peace with my process and know that I am a fuller, wiser and more effective coach, speaker and human being because of it.

When we worry about problems that may happen in the future we project ourselves into that imagined future. We visualize ourselves in the future, and go there. Our awareness is in this projected future, and not in present time. But, the future doesn’t exist yet. We then get lost, like living in a dream at night. It feels weird, uncomfortable and scary because things aren’t real. It’s illusion – a bad dream and a waste of time and energy.

Here are some positive beliefs that I use to stay happy, hopeful and present now:

1. Everything happens for a (good) reason, whether I know what that reason is or not.

2. I can handle all obstacles put in my path. If it’s on my path, I can handle it (or it wouldn’t be on MY path).

3. Challenges are opportunities for growth and renewal.

4. Everything that goes down must come back up – and in a new, refreshed way.

5. Worrying about things I can’t control is a waste of my energy. Positive thinking will support me.

The sky is not falling, and the world is not sinking into the vast economic abyss. These are limiting beliefs. I concede, this is a time of enormous transition and change, but you and I will both be fine. I choose to believe this; and I know through experience that my beliefs define my future reality. Let’s create a great new world together by believing we can, and visualizing an even better future.

If you’d like assistance with creating a great present and future, contact me at debhill@TheAwarenessInitiative.com.

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